Writing Ray – Hint of a Prologue and Camp Nano!

Howdy there chaps!
Hope y’all are having an excellent Thursday (I strangely find them much preferable to Tuesdays, I hate Tuesdays with a vehemence known only to Sam Winchester :P)

For today’s post in the Writing Ray series, I thought I’d give you lovelies a wee hint of the Prologue from my book/novel/story whatever the hell I call it. It’s the only thing I have from the first third of the story so far so it may be a while until anyone other than the Privileged One *winks* gets to read anything else from it.

But never fear because hopefully I shall be remedying this lack of beginning during April when I attempt Camp Nano which is the off-season version of Nanowrimo which is in November (Ye olde readers of Ray Reads Books will perhaps recall the fatal Nano attempt of 2010). Camp Nano is different in that you get to set your own word count so it’s less pressurised if that’s what you need.
I’m aiming to write 25,000 words on my Current novel and more specifically write the first 25K of the story since all my scenes so far have been for later on in the book.
So come closer to April I shall post a bit more about that maybe….

Anyways now for the exciting bit (or so I hope it will be for y’all). Here for your enjoyment and if constructive, your writing critique. Here is a chunk of the Prologue from my novel which has been vair tentatively titled Fire Will Tell (it’ll probably change unless I get attached).

The Citadel was under siege and the King with fire in his hair stood looking out over his city with fear in his heart. In his arms lay his newborn daughter, a mere wisp of copper visible on the crown of her head. All this ruin for one little Princess.
King Keelan sighed; it had been futile to hope that the darkest day of his reign would not be today. Barely a year under his rule and his brother’s lust for power had overwhelmed his sense. Isaiah was going to sacrifice everything for a chance to be King.
A door flew open behind him. The dishevelled Baron Deryn had arrived, bloodied sword in hand. Keelan’s boyhood friend was pale and shaking.
“Majesty there are Amberford soldiers making their way to this wing!” he panted. “I had to cut my way through a squad to get here ahead of them. We must leave immediately!”
“Deryn, do you know why Isaiah has declared his intention to take the throne? Why now in particular?” Keelan turned away from the disheartening sight out the window to face the younger man, cradling his daughter close against his chest.
“She is the reason,” he held out the swaddled infant. “My daughter. Isaiah believes that because my wife bore a girl under a red star, the Gods have deemed my line unfit to rule. He is rending this city apart because he has been swayed by the fanatical ravings of the Duke of Amberford.”
Deryn stared at his King “Kelvan is mad with grief for his wife. He would sacrifice his own newborn son if the Gods would return Elenora to him. I fear for the boy’s safety while his father is in such wrathful humours.” Retrieving a handkerchief from his pocket, Deryn began cleaning off his blade.
Nodding sadly Keelan approached his friend. “This I know, and it is why I must ask too much of you. Kelvan’s rage has spurred my brother into treason and I fear that he may sacrifice the Princess to strengthen his cause. You must take her now and keep her safe. The passages between the walls lead down and out in the Temple Quarter, follow the signs of the star and it will bring you to the Mother’s Temple.”
Confusion flickered on the Baron’s face as the King handed him his only child. “Are you not coming with me through the tunnels Keelan?” Opening his jerkin he carefully tucked the child inside before buttoning it back up. His swordbelt would stop her from slipping down.
“I cannot flee, if Isaiah wants my crown he will have to wrest it from my dead hands. I can also prevent anyone from following you. Now go Deryn, keep my daughter safe. A day will come when she will be a guiding star for the realm. She will be their hope. Gods blessings go with you both.”
Keelan held out his arm, Deryn reached to clasp forearms with his oldest friend for what was to be the last time they met in this life. Clear blue eyes met sombre brown ones. Though only three years separated them in age, at that moment Deryn could see decades of wisdom shining from the youthful King.
“May the Gods forgive me, I will do everything in my power to protect her Majesty,” saluting he turned and made for the open panel in the wall behind the King’s desk.
Readying his own sword Keelan cast a look towards the main door as the heavy footfalls of soldiers in armour approached. His fate was soon to be decided, that of his heir was not out of his hands.
He called out one last time to his friend, “Deryn? If you see Emelyne, tell her I love her always and that I have entrusted our Star to you.”
The Baron nodded grimly and closed the secret door behind. Now it was just several miles of narrow passages between him and safety. He needed a plan to avoid getting killed once he got out of the Citadel.
Lifting a torch from a bracket on the dusty wall Deryn began to run, his other arm acting as a shield against knocks to the sleeping infant now in his care. Soft tufts of copper hair peeked out from inside her swaddling clothes. This was all too much responsibility for one man to bear.
*Keeps eyes closed* There… half of the Prologue… argh.
What you guys think? Anything? Nothing? *flies away*