Writing Ray – The awkward questions from relatives

Afternoon m’lovelies, I wasn’t too sure what post I wanted to do today since I need to do a July Reading round-off post but I also wanted to share the rather awksies situation I found myself in yesterday while on a coach trip to Llandudno with my mother and Gran.

I was a last-minute replacement for my sister who injured herself at work the other week (how she still functions like a human I do not know – I’m sure she ought to be a cyborg by now) to help my mum push my Gran round Llandudno. Since I’m now footloose and fancy-free after finishing work I was like “sure, why not?” I haven’t been to the Welsh seaside in forevs and if it was nice and sunny then it would be lovely albeit kinda sweaty if I was pushing the wheelchair.

Anyway this relates to my writing because rather than taking a book to read on the coach journey there and back I decided to take my notebooks for my current WIP which I’ve got back into writing recently. So there I am on the coach sat by the window angling my notebook away from my mother so she can’t read what I’m working on when my grandmother pipes up asking me what I’m doing.

How do you go about explaining your Fantasy novel to your 74 yr old Grandma in a way that won’t sound mental? How do you explain just the fact that you are writing down the ideas that dribble out of your head? I made some very vague references to it being a story similar to what I like to read and didn’t say much else.

Then she asks the most irritating question that I’m sure most non-published writers get asked – “Are you going to get it published?” As if it’s just a case of taking the handful of pages that fell out of your printer into a publisher, plonking it down onto a desk as is and being given a pretty, bound book straight back. I had to try and explain that not only is my book not finished, it is also going to require a fuck-ton of editing undoubtedly and then that’s not even getting near to the mainstream route of queries, agents and publishers – if I get there at all.

I also found it bizarre how my family seem to have got this idea that I’ve been writing stories solidly since I was a child. Yes when I was younger I probably did (I can’t honestly say I remember) but I have never finished a story in my teens/adult life so far. What do they think I’ve been doing for all this time? It was just so odd to hear my Gran talking about my “stories” as if I’ve done loads and they’re just lying about my house waiting to be published. Dude I wish that was the case!

Another strangely awkward relative situation recently is that my mother is completely fine with the idea of my writing. To the point that she is more than happy for me to be doing a Creative Writing module as part of my Open University degree. I find this so unexpected and bewildering you wouldn’t believe – I expected disapproval and hints to do something more worthwhile not… whatever it is that my mother thinks about it all.

So yea that was yesterday. In terms of actual writing it was a pretty good day – I got three pages hand-written for what is currently going to be my first chapter which has kinda ended up as 6 pages. Now I gotta type all that up into Scrivener and see what the finished first draft version will be. If you’re really lucky maybe I shall post that and the prologue up onto my Wattpad.

If you care to have a read of a little snippet I put up last week which is related to my WIP but not actually part of the novel then take a mosey over here. Any thoughts or comments on that will be muchly appreciated.

Right I’ve spent too long writing this – getting distracted by other interwebby stuff. I may do another post soon on some of the music that has been part of my writing process more recently.

Toodles
Ray x

Writing Ray – Forget yesterday, write today

So if you were one of the 6 people who saw the post that was here up until this afternoon or if you saw my rather frantic twitter conversation late last night then you might know that I had a bit of a writerly freak-out yesterday. This sudden spiral into fear and self-doubt came over me after I finished an amazing fantasy novel that had me flailing all over the place when I realised how long I had to wait for the sequel.

Then that stupid little voice came nagging – “*Your* book will never be this good,” it said like the little shit it is. “Why you haven’t written anything for 2 months!” “What’s the point of even carrying on with it? It won’t be half as good as *that* book” Y’know the standard kind of negative shit internet trolls throw at you, except this was coming from my own fucking brain. *anguished wail*

I go through phases like this where a previously optimistic and happy mood just get shattered and dragged down by sudden negative thoughts. Then I find it very hard to feel good about any projects I’m working on and everything I do feels all rather futile and pointless – “It’s all shit so why should I continue with it?” kind of mentality.

So I wigged out on twitter. Several people came to my aid; my ever-awesome bestie/twinnie Jess, the lovely Lily from The Whispering of the Pages and another kind twitter user. All had very helpful advice for me to try and motivate me back onto the horse when all I was thinking of was bolting and never looking back at my book again.

This morning, when I woke up at around quarter to nine I picked up the notepad and pencil I had put on my beside table before I went to sleep, stuck in my earphones and started to write. And I wrote. I kept writing even while I was in Wetherspoons getting breakfast with Le Boyf (who has to be credited for his awesomeness in not questioning why this particular Sunday morning I simply *had* to write and bring my notebook with me to breakfast). I finally finished the scene I was writing around 2pm-ish and felt pretty awesome.

12 pages of my yellow legal notepad (because those things are cool) were full of my scribblings. After two months of nothing but angsty thoughts that I should be writing but wasn’t, I had gone and got 12 pages written. Fucking suck on that Negative Ray of Yesterday.

I then spent the next 2 hours typing up all my penciled pages into my Scrivener project – in a separate document since this scene is not necessarily going to end up in the book, I wrote it in 1st person POV rather than the 3rd person POV I’ve been writing the rest of the book in.

It turns out that I managed to write 1,944 words today. Nearly 2K of story that I didn’t have before – regardless of whether it goes into the book or not, it has gotten me to write and think about my book, write from my main character’s POV about a time in her life that was a fulcrum between the old and the new. What I’ve written today has given me a base to jump from to write the scenes between my main character and the person she meets for the first time in this scene.

I have to say a massive thank you to Jess & Lily for being so awesome so late last night – without you guys I may have spent the rest of the night bad-thinking myself to a point where I simply just put my notebooks away so they couldn’t make me feel guilty about abandoning them. And Stupid Negative Ray would have simply said “It’s for the best,” without a second thought.

Thanks to you I didn’t do that, I got up the determination to start writing and damn it I wrote for something like 4 hours! *super-massive squooshy hugs*

Now the only thing I have left to say is – Does anyone want to read what I wrote this morning? Just purely for the hell of it with no context if you don’t want to know the whole spiel about my book. If so then please leave me a comment (heck leave me one even if you don’t, I just don’t get enough comments these days and it makes me a bit sad) and I shall either post it up on here or email it over depending on how chicken I feel.

So yea, let me know.

Sorry for being weird guys,
Ray